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• … I’d like to feel sexy, but then that freakin’ mirror in the bathroom reminds me that I’m not.
• … I wonder what it was like for the hos in high school. I don’t want to *be* a ho, just wonder what went thru their heads. How did they feel about themselves? About the guys they were with?
• … I want a “Do whatever I want and get away with it” Pass. Do they sell those?
• … I don’t write everything I eat down on my food log for boot camp. I ate 2 pizza rolls yesterday that I didn’t long bc I was too lazy to look up the calories.
• … I think it’s awesome that my 3 yr old sings “Teenage Dirtbag” and “Gives You Hell.” Other times I think that must mean I’m a bad mom.
• … I want to quit blogging, but then I know I’d miss it. Plus,  I  really like hosting giveaways!!
• … I wanna stop babysitting kids. Ok- that’s not “sometimes,” that’s everyday.
• … I wonder *why* we were suppose to move to Texas.
• … I wish certain people would just disappear.
• … I am totally jealous of my husband and his career.
• … I wonder why my husband married me. I see him cringe at some of the things I say and do. lol
• … I wonder if there will ever be a time when the exes aren’t acting like buttholes?
• … I want to get a job outside of the home, but know I’m not qualified for anything. I also experience “Mom Guilt.”
• … I wonder why my parents never bought me Doc Martens even though I asked for them for 3 Christmases in a row.
• … I still feel insecure in who I am. You’d think I’d be over that since I’m freakin’ 33.
• … I don’t want to go to church.
• … I talk too much.

Hey, remember these lil plants from back in April?? Well, this is what they look like now!!:

Yeah. We pretty much rock at gardening…

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I’ve been having a bum time lately. Idk what the deal is. I kinda feel like I did in high school where I’m thinkin “Who the heck am I?” Do y’all ever do that or am I just weird? I feel like I’m such a mix of like 40 different personalities. Thankfully my husband loves every one of them- for the most part. I know he has a hard time understanding my “rebellious” nature, but he tries his best not to look at me like I’m a total dirtbag. lol “Dirtbag” is my word of the day. I was listening to Wheatus’ song “Teenage Dirtbag” and Tristan thought that was the funniest word ever. lol Heard another funny saying I’ll be stealing. When we were chatting, Not So Average Mama said “I think we all have a first crap bag…” referring to sucky exes. lol Crap bags indeed!
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I had a garage sale this week and made $175. YAY! We have a trip planned to Florida this summer which will be our 1st complete family vacation since I was pregnant with Taj. We don’t have the money to go because all our money (and then some;) has been going to an attorney in Canada. But thankfully my parents own a timeshare in Florida, with a built in kitchen, etc… so basically all we have to do is get there and buy groceries and hang on the beach. I am thankful that certain people haven’t completely ruined everything. And now with the $175 we can decide between gas money to Florida or 1/2 an hour of attorney fees. Decisions….

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I’ve still been doing P90X although not 6 days a week. It’s more like 4 days a week. I switched from Classic to Lean because let’s face it- pull ups aren’t gonna make my butt smaller. The lean version concentrates more on weightloss. Sei is doing the classic version. Oh- speaking of pull ups… If I jump I can do one. ONE- which is the same amount I could do in 5th grade. Yesssssssssssssss.

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That’s about it. I would write more but I don’t wanna bore you with my depressiveness. Have a happy day!